12 Ideas I Loved at This Summer's Hamptons Events

The scene outside the tent of Southampton Hospital is where the ladies who lunch show what they wear to an expensive dinner, which for this crowd means long. But this year, the usuals were somewhat upstaged by Formula 1 race cars and models sporting Graff diamonds and emeralds and dresses by Alberta Ferretti. Graff C.E.O. Henri Barguirdjian, a great fellow, was on hand, but he wouldn’t tell me what anything cost. Spoil sport!

As you can see, the Watermill Center gala exhibits are not for the meek. Yes, that is a giant butt plug (a 60-foot inflatable piece by Paul McCarthy), and yes, that is a giant red phallus the body-painted-but otherwise-largely-unclothed women performers of the “Voluptuous Horror of Karen Black.” Eventually the phallus was mounted (ahem!) on a stage, some guitars slung over shoulders, and the ladies gave a spirited, if confusing, show. The work was authored by Kembra Pfahler.

Here she is, the undisputed queen of performance art, Marina Abramovic, cubed as it were. It was beautiful and hypnotizing and not a little bit scary.

Normally I can’t abide leaf blowers, particularly not at cocktail hour, but this piece, Heeran Lee’s “Blow It,” performed in the pouring rain, was hysterical. An artist would blow the giant balloon, sometimes menacingly, into the crowd, who would dutifully keep the ball in play.

Hanna Reidmar presented an interactive piece called "Slingshot." The performer would hang back with his elastic wiffle-ball head and gesture for guests to come closer, then rush in as if to catch you in the web. I wondered if you were supposed to touch him. (I didn’t, for the record.)

LongHouse is a 16-acre campus in East Hampton founded by Jack Lenor Larsen, who also founded the eponymous decorative fabric company that is still a leader today. His preserve and museum have quietly become a major player in the arts and celebrity benefit scene, and Lou Reed, Laurie Anderson, Kim Cattrall, and Edward Albee were all on hand to prove the point. The event featured dancers in gold and hooped dervish dresses and had other performance pieces to honor Robert Wilson, the founder of Watermill Center. This floating balloon was projected with a lunar image, concocted by Matt Murphy Event Lighting.

The invitation’s suggested dress code was “Compose Yourself in White, Black, and a Touch of Voguish Yellow” and Pennington Flowers decked out the lap pool to match.

Count me among the people who had sworn off the polo matches. The last time I went I saw a cast of thousands pawing at the bar and a number of ladies who looked suspiciously for hire. But then I heard that Polo model and player Nacho Figueras had taken over the event with a partner and was determined to make the events exclusive once again—signing up Town & Country as a sponsor was a good step. But better still was the installation of the Pointy Snout caviar bar, featuring oodles of the white sturgeon black gold and cocktails mixed by Chase White of the Experimental Cocktail Club on the Lower East Side. Yummy all the way around, right?

The centerpieces at Southampton Hospital’s summer gala, were light and airy, and really tall which made sense given the cavernous tent. But they were cross-table conversation friendly at the same time.

I admired the printed cotton tablecloths—the designer responsible for the decor was Steven Stolman who said the tablecloths were made from a Scalamandre fabric especially for the party called "Jour de Juin," or Day in June). They are being sold for $75 with 100 percent of the proceeds going to the Southampton Hospital Foundation by calling 631.726.8700 ext. 3

Finally, some peace and quiet could be found in the Meltzer’s backyard, where a pour was held to get the committee steamed up for Princess Yasmin Aga Khan’s annual event in honor of her famous and talented mother. This magnificent bar arrangement was done by Ron Wendt Design (my former neighbors, hi guys!).

This is the behemoth of all Hamptons fashion events, a discount sale and day-long eating and drinking picnic with hundreds of tables inside for V.I.P. shoppers and notably, a kids section that boasts rides and games like Super Mario—Nintendo had its own tent where I wanted to spend the whole day. Love Super Mario. Here, Kelly Ripa, who comes to Super Saturday every year (I’m impressed by celebs who come year after year, aren’t you?) gamboled onto the Ferris wheel for a spin. In Style is the main sponsor every year.

The hugeness of Super Saturday was mitigated by the low-tech remembrance wall, where people pinned notes and messages to loved and lost ones who fell victim to ovarian cancer. There was Liz Tilberis, whose North Woods home was the site of the first event, and who I really cared for, plus a few other women I knew, and, well even we jaded party people occasionally cop to being touched.